Why Christians Need Story

And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, and they did not love their lives to the death.  Revelation 12:11

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It took Hollywood by surprise..  The small movie, produced in 2006 for $100,000, made three million dollars in the first two weekends.  Facing the Giants was called the "Little Movie that Could," and it violated most of the rules for a blockbuster movie,  It  didn't have sex scenes.  It wasn't violent.  It wasn't marketed for children, though children could see it.  And, it targeted a small segment of the population... Christians.  The reviews from secular publications were not positive.  And yet, it ended up grossing over ten million dollars domestically.  It opened the door for other films to be made that shared the magic of story from a Christian point of view.

My bookshelves are full.  When I became a Christian, in my early thirties, I looked at my shelves of romance and action books, and I knew that this was not what God would want me reading.  It was a bit tough to let go of the characters in books, as they had become my friends in many ways.  But they were the kind of friends that I knew would influence me poorly.  And so, I trashed nearly all of them.  I threw them away.

The power of story has always deeply influenced me.  Stories influence my thoughts and emotions.  They influence decisions.  They inspire.  And so, when I threw away the books full of things I knew God would not want me to keep putting into my mind and heart, I needed a replacement.  I needed to have access to books that would inspire my new life as a Christian, that would teach and guide, that would flood me with all the things of God in the way that I had been flooded with the things that were not of God before I followed Jesus.

I filled my life with the novels by Karen Kingsbury, Tim LaHaye, Davis Bunn, Robin Jones Gunn, Terri Blackstock, and others.  I filled my mind with the stories of others finding and living for Jesus, through all the ups and downs in their lives.  As I did so, I found friends again, in the fictional characters.  I found a place where I could go to when my life was struggling or my faith was tested.

Stories are vitally important or God wouldn't have used them.  The Bible is full of stories about the lives of His people.  Jesus taught through the use of parables, stories that have lessons for His followers.  Story was used for generations, oral narrations gave history and lessons and meaning to people in all cultures.  How can we overcome when life is oppressing us, when we are tired and tested, when we need to see God working?  By the blood of the Lamb (our only way to salvation) and the word of our testimony.

What does our testimony do?  If we love Jesus and serve Him, our testimony tells of Him.  It tells of what he did in certain situations in our lives.  It inspires others to know that they are not alone, that not only is God with them in their challenges, but that others have also walked a similar path, and God was with them.  I love to tell what God did when, after years and years of prayers and struggling, we watched God not only bring my step-daughter out of a rough environment, but bring healing to her soul.  When I see a parent that is worried for the safety of their child, I can understand that parent.

We overcome through the use of story because story reminds us that the world isn't just about us, but rather that it is a story about Him.  That story is still ongoing, at work in our lives every day.

I recently read the story The Impossible by Joyce Smith.  The book tells the true story of her son falling through the ice and being underwater for over fifteen minutes.  He was without a heartbeat for  45 minutes.  He was dead.  Joyce walked into that Emergency Room and began to pray.  Her son's heart began to beat.

The story continues with the struggle of the boy's healing, the fears and doubts of the family, the decision of the family to refuse to allow death to be spoken around the boy.  It is the story of a family that watched God heal their son, the son that should have died, the son that should have been a vegetable.  A little over two weeks after the accident, the boy walked out of the hospital, completely healed.  He had no brain damage.  He was healed.

These are the reasons we need story.  I have heard about, read, and studied for years the power of speaking life.  This story, of a family and church choosing to apply the principle and stick with it was more impacting to my spiritual walk than all the study I have done previously.  Story... a testimony... changed how I choose to speak about my situations and struggles.

The power of story needs to be understood by every Christian.  Not all stories have the endings we associate with happy.  For instance, the book Coming Home by Karen Kingsbury deals with the death of not just one loved one, but nearly every member of a family in a tragic accident.  I cried and was deeply grieved by the loss in this book, as the characters had become known to me through the years of reading about them in the series.  And yet, the hope given in the book was astounding, even in the face of grief.

I thought about the father in the story, knowing his daughter was dying, and choosing to trust God anyway.  I thought about it when I read it, and it came back to me when my own daughter was in the ICU last October.  God spared my child.  But I knew God reminded me of that story as a way for me to see clearly that, in the midst of fear and pain, I could still choose to trust Him, no matter what happened.  My fear was great, as I didn't want to lose my precious daughter, but He met me in those moments, and reminded me of a book I had read a couple of years earlier.

How amazing is our God?  How great is His love for us?  He gave us the gift of story!

We all have our different ways of absorbing story.  Some of us like the straight-out stories told in books or movies.  Some of us feel story in music.  Some us like to listen to others, because the story of their lives in interesting.  Some of prefer our stories to be in forms that are more visual, such as graphic novels or works of art.  Either way, story changes our world, and Christians need this now more than ever.

The stories we see on the nightly news or that are focused on in the media are often not glorifying to God.  The stories that are most popular today reflect the cultural norms and values, not the ones God shows.  While we should desire to be informed, we also need to be transformed.  The negativity and even outright hostility of the things of God in our secular world can leave us feeling as if we are losing the battle in a war that the Bible states we win.  We can lose hope.  We have to purposely put God-glorifying story into our lives.

I am always thrilled when the Gospel is told in a culturally relevant way.  Sometimes that takes thinking outside the box and presenting the truth of Jesus to people in a way that uses the current culture.   That is precisely what Jesus did in His parables.  He used what the culture of the time knew and understood.  The Prodigal Son is a story that most of us have found ways to relate to because, throughout time, prodigals still exist.  And yet, most of us don't give the oldest child a double inheritance or go to the backyard and kill the fatted calf when we decide to hold a celebration.  We don't understand just how insulting it was in that culture for a child to ask for his inheritance before the death of a parent.  Those that heard the Parable at the time would have understood, and it wouldn't have had to be explained.  Today, we have to explain just how significant these details are to people for them to understand.  Telling the story of a prodigal from today's perspective, with applicable current cultural norms, can be a reason someone's world is changed.

Please, Christians, tell your story, and be creative when doing so.  Tell how Jesus has changed your life.  Tell how He has brought you out of your slavery.  Were you trapped in the chains of addiction?  Were you locked in the bars of abuse?  Were you a prodigal that God brought back?  If God saved you through His Son Jesus, you have a story that glorifies Him.

Use words.  Write music.  Paint a picture.  Be visual.  Film a movie.

If that seems too big, then remember your life is a story.  Tell it in the mediums we all use every day.  Tell what God is doing or has done on Facebook.  Post the pictures of what God is doing in your life on Instagram.  Let your story be one that the Lord sees and uses, even though it is flawed and even though it is full of mistakes.  You never know how your story, your testimony, will help someone else to overcome. The pictures tell more than a thousand words.  The songs, the ones that give glory to Jesus, are the soundtrack of our story. 

Don't discount what your testimony can do in your own life.  Sometimes remembering what God has done in my life and in the lives of loved ones reminds me that He is not done, and that if He saw me through before, He will again.  The Bible is full of times God told His people to remember.  He had monuments built so that people would remember.  He established holidays and feasts so people would remember.  In those feasts and at those monuments, the stories of God's redemption is retold, over and over, becoming part of the fabric of the lives of His people.  His chapters become written on our hearts as we retell and remember His great redemptive works. 

I will continue to promote the beauty of story in the lives of Christians.  I will continue to encourage others to engage in story and allow the beauty of what God is doing in the world to flood your being.  I honestly believe that sharing our stories, humbly, with all glory given to Jesus, is one of the best weapons for overcoming.  A story can change perspective.  It can inspire.  It can move hearts.  It can transform lives.  It can plant seeds for salvation.  Stories teach the most long-lasting lessons.  Story uses emotion and imagery and words to teach, touching each part of the brain so that we don't easily forget.

Christians needs story.

Scripture Writing

It’s so simple, really.  I’ve done it before, but this time it is not a neat idea or a duty.  It is joy.

One of my favorite books is Safely Home by Randy Alcorn  The story is amazing.  Set in China, the story is about the persecution of Christians there.  In one part of the story, a section of a Bible is brought out.  It is handwritten.  When the main character asks why it was smudged, he is told those were the tear stains from the one that copied the words.

Since that time, I would often hand-copy Scripture.  But...  I wasn’t consistent.  Mostly I would hand-copy Scripture verses when I was studying and the verses pertained to the topic.  Hand-writing the verses always helped me to remember them.

In December, I was handed a printout of verses to write out as part of an actual Scripture writing plan.  

Our leader had made each lady a copy.  I decided that I would attempt to follow the plan and see how it went.  I bought a small journal for the very purpose of keeping the Scripture writing in one place. 

Writing Scriptures is something that I have fallen in love with in a very short time.  In those moments, I am not just reading the Bible.  I’m not digging deeply into Greek or Hebrew meanings.  It is just my pen and God’s Word.  

Scripture writing is s...l...o...w!  I try to not make errors (but I do), which means paying attention to detail.  Think about it, writing something longhand is very slow reading.  It isn’t just glancing at the words on a page, it is meditating on them, perhaps rereading them a couple times as you write each section of the sentences.  

“It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭55:11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

The process of physically writing the verses works the same way anything a person writes out long-hand works. The mind makes a physical connection to the material with the act of transcribing something long-hand.  According to Forbes, “Handwriting increases neural activity in certain sections of the brain, similar to meditation.”

“Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.”

‭‭Joshua‬ ‭1:8‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“But they delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭1:2‬ ‭NLT‬‬

God discusses the benefits of meditating on His Word.  What does it mean to meditate on the Word of God?  It means to roll it over in your brain, to think about it, to repeat it to yourself.  Scripture writing does this.  As you write, you are slowly meditating on the words and phrases.  

Forbes also says, “...sequential hand movements, like those used in handwriting, activate large regions of the brain responsible for thinking, language, healing and working memory.”

I knew writing verses out by hand would help to memorize them.  I was stuck by the word ‘healing.’  

“The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭12:18‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭16:24‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Right before Jesus preached the Beatitudes, the Bible has this to say:

...“who had come to hear him and to be healed of their diseases. Those troubled by impure spirits were cured, and the people all tried to touch him, because power was coming from him and healing them all.”

‭‭Luke‬ ‭6:18-19‬ ‭NIV‬‬

People came to see Jesus and just tried to touch Him so they could be healed of their diseases.  Can we expect the same from words on a page? 

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”

‭‭John‬ ‭1:1‬ ‭NIV‬‬

If we take the above verse to heart, the Words we are writing are Jesus.  “And the Word became flesh...”(John 1:14).  Do I think writing Scriptures will heal me?  Who am I to question the power of the Lord.  He heals my heart every time I write.  I almost always have a moment of the Lord filling me with Hos presence and His peace. If He does that with a few verses, I believe His Word has power.

Writing Scriptures is something that only takes a few minutes.  And yet, those few minutes are sometimes the most beautiful part of my day.  It often sets the tone for prayer.  There is a quote I love to share: “Prayer is when we talk to God.  Time in the Word is when He talks to us.”  

Take the time to write out His Word, and I promise He will speak to you.

See Ya Later While I Carry On

My husband and I have been married for eighteen years.  In that time, there has been many changes in our lives.  Such is life...  change.  In those years we have said good-bye to loved ones.  Several have gone home to be with the Lord, including the two beloved faces above.

The two above were strong figures in our families.  They were examples we often remember during times of struggle. They were known for being giving and loving and beautiful souls others wanted to be around.  

Were they perfect?  No.  Their flaws and their histories made them compassionate and understanding.  To this day, they are missed.  To this day, we think of them on every holiday and birthday, weekends visiting each other... We tell stories of our precious memories with them.  In this way, they live on, here in our hearts and memories. They left a legacy of faith and family and love.  I can still hear their voices, even after five and nine years of passing time.  

I sometimes wonder what advice they would have for us now.  What would they say about the choices we have made in the years since?  How would they react to our struggles?  Our triumphs?  Our frustrations? Our petty disputes?  The children that have grown?  The beautiful babies that have been born?

I wonder sometimes if, in heaven, the ones that have already completed the journey here get to know the ones that are on the way.  Did my grandson meet his great-great grandma even before he was born?  Did the newest great-niece, just months old, get to meet the great-grandpa that would have loved her so dearly?  

One day, whether they met already or not, I pray they meet again, in a place I long for, at a homecoming more anticipated than any baby’s birth or soldier’s return. 

What would they say to the loved ones still here, in this broken, cursed earth with sickness and fears and doubts and pain?  What would they tell us when they see our struggles and hurts?  We know they would rejoice over the gatherings and births and beautiful moments.  I miss them at those times, because their absence is still felt so keenly. But I also miss them in the moments of confusion, when their wisdom could bring clarity.  I miss them in the times of frustration, when their understanding and compassion were a healing balm.  They are so missed...

I am not completely clueless about what they would say.  None that loved them are completely uncertain.  We knew what they believed.  It was not a secret.  We knew how they loved because it touched and impacted not just our lives, but countless others.  We know, even still, that their prayers are still being answered, even after they have completed their journey. 

We don’t always see those answered prayers on our timetable.  Perhaps some, spoken in quiet, private moments, between a weeping follower and a merciful, loving Savior, are still unanswered. God, after all, doesn’t live in the bonds of our time table.  A prayer yet unanswered when God calls His child home doesn’t mean that the prayer died also.  

“He always stands by his covenant— the commitment he made to a thousand generations.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭105:8‬ ‭NLT‬

In the moments when I most long to hear the voice of a loved one, listen to their advice, have one more day; I feel the weight of their prayers spoken years ago.  They prayed not prayers for only themselves.  They prayed not for riches. They prayed for the very hearts and souls of their loved ones.  They prayed for blessed lives and joy, sure.  Mostly they prayed for the ones they loved to know the ultimate love... the love of Jesus.

No matter the doubts, the disbelief, and even the apathy of those that were prayed for, the prayers still happened.  The prayers still have power.  The prayers still stand, and God is still moving, still working, still answering, still honoring the heartfelt requests of those that chose to honor, love, and serve Him.  Their pasts didn’t matter.  Their circumstances didn’t matter.  Their flaws didn’t matter.  All that mattered was their hearts wanted Him, wanted their loved ones to know the freedom that comes from honoring, loving, and serving Him.  

I remind myself often, especially in the heartbroken moments when all in my world seems to have changed, when all in my world is full of people that are angry or disappointed or depressed in some way, that the story isn’t finished yet.  The chapters are still being written.  The prayers that were said way back in time for us can still be answered.  And if the prayers from the past can be answered, my prayers today can be answered.  

“And if it doesn’t turn out like I think it should, that doesn’t change the fact Your always good.  Your ways are higher than mine.”  

Tricia Brock, What I Know)

Changes are difficult.  Most of us struggle with change.  We struggle with loss.  We struggle with uncertainty.  We feel overwhelmed by the chaos, defeated by the battles, and wounded by unexpected weapons and foes.  And yet, I have seen forgiveness modeled for me.  I have seen people live so well that there were very few in their world that didn’t long to give love back to them.  Such was the example of the two pictured above.  Such is the person I hope to be.

I work to give that same love to those around me.  I fail, of course, but I keep working because to keep going is what I know to do.  I choose to pray for loved ones with the same passion, the same devotion as those that walked before me, completely trusting the God that blessed me with the living examples he placed in my life.  I hope my life honors the spiritual legacy of devoted loved ones, because I know that they honored Christ.  How could I want any less for my own life? 

Their journey home means I got to say, “See you later.”  I know I will.  I believe they would tell me lots of things.  “Let go of anger.”  “Love and serve the Lord.”  “Always forgive.”  “Trust in Him.”  And while doing those things, I believe they would say, “Carry on.”  

“Carry on with what I prayed.”

“Carry on with showing love to this broken world.”

“Carry on with cherishing the life He has blessed you with.”

“Carry on with walking out your journey for Him.” 

Procrastinating

At times, I procrastinate.  I know there are things I should be doing, but just get busy or lazy or weary.  Most of the time, I am really good about doing what needs to be done.  The bills are paid on time.  Schoolwork for both homeschooling and college gets completed in a timely fashion.  My home may get cluttered.  I may forget the laundry in the washer for a day or two and have to rewash the clothes.  For the most part, however, I don’t think I put off too much.

Except...

My health.  I was on a Ketogenic diet last year, and I was feeling good.  My energy level was high. My weight dropped a bit.  But then life happened.  The paycheck was low, and I struggled buying separate food just for me.  I already have to eat gluten-free.  Then college classes overwhelmed me.  I would cave more and more because I was stressed.  My daughter was in the ICU twice in two months, and I felt even more stress.  I am totally a stress eater. 

Spiritually, I felt the weight of the world.  I went through a very dark time.  For awhile, I just stopped caring about the food I consumed. I was so busy all the time that I stopped walking.  I even stopped taking my supplements and vitamins.  I still avoided gluten because I literally get sick when I eat it, but I gave up Keto.

My snacks of nuts and water became chips and diet soda.  The holidays offered many sweet treats, and I indulged greatly.  

The plan was to begin again in the New Year.  But money was tight after Christmas and, still on break from schoolwork, I just wanted to enjoy my time of rest.  I ignored the aching that I know is caused from elevated inflammation.  I ignored the slumps that hit in the afternoon. I was so tired I often felt I could take a nap.  Sometimes I did.  I ignored the hunger.  The last two weeks, I feel like I am hungry all the time!

I know that all of this comes from excess sugars in my body. I know that my body was keto-adapted, and then it disappeared with eating lots of sugary, carb-loaded foods.  Basically, I have felt sick and tired once again.  

Having two autoimmune diseases, inflammation and high sugars are a nasty combination over time.  I spent a long time last year studying the impact of sugar consumption on autoimmune diseases.  It isn't a lack of knowledge, it is simply a cycle of stress, busyness, and limited resources leading to frustration and then to apathy.  Even when I felt the inflammation levels rise, I procrastinated.

It is human nature to take the easiest path... even when that path is leading us down a road of sickness and more health problems.  After the nightmare of September through November, I knew my life was out of balance in a big way.  I made it through the semester in my college classes and then dropped to part-time.  I am diligently working to feel good again.  I am restarting my supplements and vitamins.  I am steadily working to lower my inflammation levels with diet and exercise.  I am spending a lot of time with the Lord, because I simply can't handle all the stresses of life without Him.

I doubt it will be smooth sailing.  I am trying to plan and set myself up for success, but it is something that is challenging.  I may have lowered my class load, but the rest of life is still there, and I still must deal.  I know that God doesn't want me sick and tired for my journey.  He has called me to be there for my loved ones, and I can't do that well if I am dealing with health issues all the time.

Time to quit procrastinating and get my health back!

 

Speak Life

Years ago I read a book by Gary Chapman titled The Five Love Languages.  This book was quite a gem, and I still have it on my shelf.  Taking the quiz, discovering my love language and the love language of my spouse, it was all very helpful.  

I learned I totally stink at one love language in particular: words of affirmation.  It’s sad, really, because it is one of my husband’s love languages.  I have to purposely try to use words of affirmation.  It doesn’t come naturally.  I will go a very long time without thinking to speak words of affirmation.  Yes, I know this can be a big issue for those that have this as a love language.  They crave validation and acceptance with words.  The craziest thing of it all is that I am a “word” person...  at least in writing.  

Over the last couple of years, I slowly began to realize that many people totally stink at this love language.  Perhaps it is a cultural thing.  The comedies on television often get the most laughs with sarcastic, biting remarks.  Sarcasm and put-downs are often seen as dry-wit.  As a culture, we have become excellent at bringing others down.  We can point out “their” flaws quickly, tell “them” off when we are offended, and put “them” in their place with choice words. 

We can do excellent work with the opposite of words of affirmation.

I read once that on Shabbat, Jewish husbands speak a blessing over their wife every week.  I was struck by the power of that, the power of a blessing spoken over the woman of a home.  Years and years of blessing spoken by a man over his wife...  it’s such a beautiful concept, honoring her instead of denigrating her, lifting up her as a woman, not demeaning her in any way.

The last several years, thanks to preaching about the topic and a bump with a song by Toby Mac, Christians have used the term “Speak Life” instead of “words of affirmation” or “speak a blessing.”  We are told to speak life, not death, over situations and people and possibilities.  The lyrics are inspiring:

So speak life, speak life
To the deadest darkest night
Speak life, speak life
When the sun won’t shine and you don’t know why
Look into the eyes of the broken hearted
Watch them come alive as soon as you speak hope
You speak love, you speak
You speak life, oh oh oh oh oh

It sounds a bit like positive thinking.  In a way it is because the Bible says:

“Brood of vipers! How can you, being evil, speak good things? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭12:34‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

So, is what we say or don’t say an indicator of where our heart stands?  The fact that so many of us are great at pointing out all that is wrong but not at what is right says something about the standing of our hearts.  

For me, I have thought about this a lot over the last couple of years.  It was a topic that weighed on me heavily when I had to speak up about uncomfortable topics, confronting issues that were not easy to confront.  I thought about whether I had spoken enough words of affirmation in the past so that, when I had to confront an issue, my heart was already known to be full of love for the person.  I fear I failed.

Even more, I know that, as a writer, it is easy to find the flaws and expound on them, but ignore the areas where I could be encouraging, building up, acknowledging and validating others.  So many of us are walking around, wounded inside from harsh words used as weapons, and we just want to feel like we have worth.

We literally withhold worth from others.  

This is true for everyone, but if someone has talents and gifts that don’t gain public attention, it is not uncommon for that person to feel as if they are less valuable than the person that receives praises for their public displays. 

Over the last couple of years I have noticed how much I stink in this area.  I have also realized that it is a (how can I say this without speaking ill of someone?) family trait (yikes).  I don’t mean to bash anyone, but traits like this do run in families.  We struggle to build up, to speak life.  We don’t struggle because we aren’t verbal.  We don’t struggle because we lack opinions.  We struggle because it is hard.  It is hard to bless others when we feel we don’t matter ourselves.  We struggle because life has always felt more like a competition and a comparison, and even if it seems immature, building up others feels like a loss.

Does it take anything from us?  No.  Could it improve relationships?  Absolutely.   The very things we seek the most: validation, acceptance, approval, acknowledgment, love; we struggle to give.  Perhaps we struggle to give it because it hasn’t ever been something we received.

This isn’t to blame parents.  They also couldn’t give away what they didn’t receive.  Some cultures are more unemotional, thinking that speaking life would be a show of weakness somehow.  Those cultures brought that closed-off habit with them when the emigrated to the United States. 

I don’t think it shows weakness.  The ability to speak life, to affirm others, to speak blessings is a strength.  It is strength that could change families and hearts.  It’s a strength that could give value and hope.  It’s a strength that is desperately needed in a world that is harsh, that cuts down, that finds humor in causing pain in others.

It takes intentionality to speak life to family and friends. It takes courage.  It takes looking for the best in people.  It takes setting yourself aside, your pride and ego, to let someone else know that they have value and worth.

We have a society in an epidemic.  Teenagers are bullied so much they are committing suicide as a way to escape the pain.  Depression and anxiety are at all-time highs, and the record number of anti-depressants being prescribed attest to this.  While I believe there are many causes, a part of me wonders if our reluctance to speak life into the lives of others isn’t a contributing factor.  After all, how much negative can a person take before they feel like crap about themselves and their lives?

Perhaps that hunger for validation explains many of the posts and pictures we see on social media.

God talked a lot about sin, but He also gave inherent worth to His children.  He calls us His heirs, chosen, adopted, the apple of His eye, bought with a high price, royalty, sons and daughters.  He sent His Son to die for us.  That is a pretty high price, one He wouldn’t have paid if He found our value lacking.  And yet it is easier to believe that we are worthless, lowly, trash.

I always wanted to feel loved and valued.  A child of a father that was absent for much of my life, I felt the opposite. I felt as if I wasn’t valuable enough to stick around for.  When my first husband rejected me for another woman, that validated in me a very negative worth.  It has taken years of walking with Jesus to even put a dent in that self-image.  

The thing is, as I look around, I see so many others like me.  Some try to fill the void with other things, but the truth is that so many of us feel as if we are missing something vital inside, something that proves we have worth.  Goodness knows we have rarely been told so, and now, we don’t know if we would believe it if we heard it.  But we so want to hear it anyway.   We so want to hear that we are loved and accepted and valuable. 

I am going to be more intentional about speaking life to my loved ones.  I don’t want there to be things I wish I had said should someone pass on when I am not ready.  Even more, I don’t want my loved ones to live in torment, feeling invaluable, when that isn’t the truth at all.  The truth is that I am amazingly blessed with an awesome family.  

Perhaps it is time to change those habits, to let myself be vulnerable, and speak life more.  I heard once that it takes ten positive things spoken to counter one negative thing.  Ask yourself if you speak ten positive things over your loved ones before you speak a negative?  If you think you do, ask yourself if that is true about that teenager that rolled her eyes?  The husband who left his clothes in the floor?  The family member that could barely disguise his contempt at the holiday dinner?  The wife who complained all evening about the kids?  The spouse that overspent at the store?  The child with the failing grade?  

I am under no illusions that this isn’t much more difficult to put into action than it is to write about on a screen at nearly two in the morning. And yet, change happens one person at a time, one decision at a time. 

Be the change you want to see in the world. Speak life. 

Don’t Let Your Heart Grow Cold

Here in the Midwest, we are in the midst of a cold snap that has temperatures in the dangerous range.  The wind chill can cause frostbite very quickly.  Experts are warning that people should not be outside for very long, and if they are, they need to wear appropriate clothing to keep them warm and safe.
 
The cold outside seems to somehow echo the cold I know I have battled in my faith.  The cold is uncomfortable at first.  Stand in it for a few minutes, however, and you begin to feel numb.  Sometimes that numbness comes with a prickling sensation.  Sometimes there is just the numbness, and you can’t feel the damage occurring.  

How often does that happen in our faith?  A chill invades our heart, from offense or wounds or hurt.  We feel uncomfortable.  Maybe we miss Him and we turn back.  Maybe we recognize that discomfort as a warning.  Or maybe we use the cold to fuel apathy.  Either way, we then become numb.  Numb is deceptive.  We don’t feel cold.  The discomfort eases.  If there is a warning, it could be in that pricking sensation in our conscience.  Again, we can heed the warning or dismiss it. 

The danger with numbness is that damage is beginning to occur.  The longer a body in extreme cold feels numb, the greater the chances of frostbite and hypothermia.  Spiritually, numbness leads to damage, and often we are unaware it is happening until it is too late.

My youngest daughter was obsessed with the movie "Frozen."  In it, Anna has her heart frozen by Elsa (her Sister) and only true love can thaw it so she can live. We spend most of the movie wondering which guy will be Anna's "true love," only to discover at the end that the true love that could heal Anna's heart was found by the giving of herself for her sister, by sacrificing her life for another.  I found it intriguing that true love didn't come with a man, a kiss, or even friendship.  True love, the kind that heals, came with a sacrifice.

The cold gets to me.  I struggle in the cold.  My muscles and joints hurt.  I hate the feeling of not being able to get warm.  But even if I am struggling with the atmosphere outside, the inside of me is warm, because the sacrifice has been made already.  Anna's sacrifice for her sister is simply an animated example (sort of) of what has already been done for us.  Jesus already gave himself up so we could live eternally.  He didn't turn to ice and then magically become thawed and healed.  He died.  He overcame the grave.  He rose again.  He bears the scars... and those scars still exist today.

The cold outside is a big topic of conversation on social media. Pipes are freezing and bursting.  Cars don’t want to start. Inside my humble little apartment, we are enjoying the last of our Christmas break.  The decorations are coming down from our holiday celebrations.  My ten year old came home from playing with a friend, and she was sad that the decorations were being boxed up once again, to wait until next year.

"The Christmas decorations getting put away means that the Christmas spirit is gone." She sulked.

"No," I told her  "The Spirit of Christmas is actually the Spirit of Jesus.  He is always with us." I told her. 

But is He?  With the bitter cold outside, I realized how often our faith can feel as cold as the Arctic winter weather outside my door.  We have hurts, frustrations, grief.  We are wounded, broken vessels so much of the time. Like Anna in Frozen, how many of us believe that we can be healed by a person or things, endlessly searching for something that will warm us, for a passion that is bigger than us, for something or someone that can consume us?  We see the cold around us, the dark that comes too early, and long for the warmth and green of Spring.

Rest assured, Spring will come.  The earth rests in winter, but that doesn't mean that in its center isn't a ball of fire and magma.  That doesn't mean that warmer weather isn't coming.  In our times of early dark and bitter cold, we may long to hibernate and protect ourselves.

There are times in our walk with God when we feel that we are in the midst of bitter, bone-chilling cold; when our hearts feel like ice and the warmth seems like it will never arrive again.  We see day after day of that same cold, and we try to warm ourselves, but the cold still awaits, just outside the door.  As long as we are uncomfortable with the cold, we will seek His warmth.  Be careful about feeling numb.  Be careful, because damage is occurring.  Stay cold enough long enough, and it can lead to death. 

We forget, when the snow piles up and the mercury drops, that the center of the earth is a flaming fire.  And we forget that that at the center of our faith, no matter how we feel, is another flaming fire.

"For our God is a consuming fire."  Hebrews 12:29

A red-hot fire awaits us, waiting to warm us, waiting to fill us, longing to melt the ice in our hearts and set our soul ablaze... with Him, for Him.  He has already sacrificed Himself for us.  He has already caused a blaze around the world, and it has continued to burn for centuries.  And He longs to burn in us, to burn away the waste in our life that takes away from His simple grace.  He longs to burn away the cold in us left by disappointments, by wounds, by grief, and fill us with Himself, to consume us with His fire.

"You are Holy.  You are worthy.  You are Holy.  You're the Lamb of God." Sings out from my bluetooth speaker, as Tenth Avenue North fills my home.  The cold seeps in as the last of the decorations are stored for next Christmas in our outside storage closet. I am reminded that the cold may try to invade, but God is inside me, and He isn't so easily frozen out.  He is a flame, a burning flame, just waiting to kindle to life and burn away the dross, the worthless, the junk, the things that attempt to freeze my heart and clutter my mind. 

God's fire is a force that is difficult to defeat.  The wind of the Holy Spirit spreads the flame of fire from person to person.  It grows in people until they are consumed.  Their lives are never the same.  The fire touches hearts, thoughts, actions, words, and destinies.   The fire of God is a force to be reckoned with, greater than any wildfire, spreading through nations, a fire that laws or oppression or even persecution can't stop. It is the fire that comes from the greatest sacrifice. 

Take precautions against the cold.  Change your environment for a bit.  Don’t stand in the snow and wind, but  seek a warm shelter.  Dress appropriately by putting on your armor.  May your stocking cap be you helmet of salvation, your coat your breastplate, your boots your shoes of peace and so forth.  Fuel yourself with the warming comfort foods of praise, worship, and the Word of God.  You will find, as you do these things, that the numbness will leave.  

I have a warning: The return of sensation and feeling after being cold and numb can be painful at first.  If damage has occurred while you were numb, this is when it will be discovered.  Rest assured that Jesus can heal any wounds, but they still might require attention.  It is easier to feel numb than to deal with why you went cold and numb.  When the numbness is gone, you then have to deal with the wounds, the grief, the hurts, the pain. 

There are seasons of life, both on the Earth and in our journey with the Lord.  Winters are often the hardest for many of us.  Seasonal affective disorder means that the dark and cold can get to us emotionally. Our mood plummets. Sometimes, the cold in our hearts comes from fighting the darkness and apathy around us for too long.  It drags us down. But light up your world.  Put the light of Jesus around you in the dark, like candles and fairy lights.  Let His Word and His presence bathe you in soft comfort. Let His fire glow inside you, bringing warmth and light like a fireplace, chasing away the cold and dark.

Intentionally light the fire.  

And know that until Spring comes with her warmth and new life, the fire of God is inside you, powerful enough to fuel fuel your faith and thaw your frozen, numb heart. 

 

Prayers

I used to go on a fast at the beginning of each year.  Then, after celiac changed my diet drastically, I stopped.  It was so difficult to be restricted all year long and then add even more I shouldn’t be eating.  

This year, I feel myself drawn to setting the stage for the rest of the year.  After all, there are many things that need prayer.  So much this last year was so difficult, and I feel as if my family is in bondage.  The health issues have been tough, but the spiritual and mental battles may surpass even the health ones. 

Whether I go on an outright fast or not isn’t the issue.  That is between me and God, but I do feel that I must take some time to really focus on my prayer life and my relationship with the Lord.  I have been so broken, so weak, for such a long time.  Even more, I see my family slipping further and further away from the Lord in the slow fade that leads to death.

But my reactions have not exactly been helpful.  Reacting emotionally, I have done all the “wrong” things. 

We have a week before my girls begin school and two weeks before I begin college classes again.  So I am going to take this time to truly seek the heart of the Lord for this year, my family, the struggles we have endured as well as those to come, and my spiritual condition.  Despite being concerned about the spiritual conditions of loved ones, I can’t give away what I don’t have.  And lately I have been riding a roller coaster of ups and downs that have left me nauseous (especially when combined with all the Christmas treats). 

My attention has been scattered for a long time.  I overloaded myself and life threw a bunch of obstacles at me this last year that brought me literally to my knees.  And so, this year, I know I simply can’t go on this way.  I need to get back my fire for Him.  I need to feel Him with me as I face the future. 

I cried many silent tears, alone, despairing at how overwhelmed I have been at...  well...  everything.  I have focused on the anxiety others close to me are battling, ignoring the fact that mine is causing massive issues. I lost my hope in the midst of the darkness that accompanied this past year. 

I have made very few New Year’s resolutions.  Getting my heart right with the Lord again is first.  Second is to write and write and write, because I process information and heal in my writing.  Third would be to embrace the introvert in me instead of trying to change her to compete with anyone else, only to feel less than.  God made me a certain way, and it is time to stop feeling like that isn’t enough.

Here’s to 2018...  a year of new beginnings...  a year of prayer...  and a year of hope.